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Thanks to Mike from Chicopee, Mass., for forwarding the following news item.

Retired Army General Says CIA Should Take a Page From the FVZA

WASHINGTON (Reuters) A defunct government agency holds the key to revitalizing the U.S. Central Intelligence Agency, according to a retired Army General.

The tactics the Federal Vampire and Zombie Agency used to fight the undead from 1868 to 1975 are just the thing the CIA needs to subdue America's new enemies, according to retired Maj. Gen. Mike Bloise of Wilmington, North Carolina. "FVZA Agents worked in the shadows," Bloise told Reuters. "They knew their enemy and didn't have to wait for a dozen supervisors to give the OK before taking them out."

Bloise and a group of current and former military leaders are petitioning Congress to create a small, elite intelligence and fighting force modeled after the FVZA, only with terrorists as targets instead of vampires. "This would be a different type of soldier," suggested Bloise. "He would be able to act independently, with minimal or no oversight." Bloise believes such an agent would have prevented the terrorist attacks of September 11. "If John Walker Lindh had been a trained agent instead of a misguided Islamicist, Osama bin Laden and his lieutenants would be dead, and 9-1-1 would never have happened," said Bloise.

Bloise criticized the CIA for having too much oversight and for clinging to outmoded ways of thinking. "Before September 11, the CIA didn't even have any agents who spoke Arabic," he said.

Bloise retired after more than 30 years' service and is a decorated veteran of the Vietnam War.

The FVZA operated within the Justice Department for a number of years before going undercover in 1936. FVZA Agents had considerable autonomy and were allowed to kill suspected vampires or zombies at their own discretion.

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