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Incident Report

Agent/Witness: Maniac

Base: Montrose, Michigan

Date/Time: August 25, 2003/1450 hours

The Flint River in Montrose
Incident: For some time now there have been reports of a "creature" living in the forested valleys around the Flint River and its watershed area. Most of these reports are unconfirmed and deal with strange noises in the night and animal mutilations. Some time ago there was a problem with feral dogs in the area, so it's always been assumed that the alleged creature is simply a pack of dogs. Hunting parties had been organized, but to my knowledge nothing substantial was found (although a large number of feral dogs were put to death).

On August 23rd, a local bar was set ablaze under rather odd circumstance. The source of the blaze was an apartment on the upper floor of the bar, according to the local volunteer fire chief. A bartender said the apartment had recently been rented to an out-of-town man who had come into the bar several days earlier claiming his car had broken down and he needed a place to stay. The bartender allowed him to rent the apartment for a week or so while parts for the car were procured. From eyewitness reports it can be assumed that this man was not, as he stated, stranded in town by a broken car. Indeed, a quick check of local shops did not turn up any vehicles that had been brought in requiring such repairs by an out-of-towner.

As the story goes, the man hung around the bar at night and, one night, invited a local woman up to his apartment. The supposed night of romance ended quickly when the man attempted to feed off his victim. Panicking, the woman knocked over a lamp and in the ensuing struggle the gas stove was turned on. You can guess the results: when the gas hit the exposed and sparking lamp, a fire was ignited. The woman escaped with only minor injuries, and the vampire was seen fleeing to the nearby river (the bar, by the way, is on the waterfront).

Agent Lewis, Agent Town, and I decided to track down this vampire before he could feed again. An outbreak in this small town would be disastrous, as it lacks the resources to effectively combat a significant vampire threat. During the planning phase of the mission, we quickly established the watershed and river itself as the vampire's primary means of movement, giving him a considerable amount of free-roaming area within which to to hide. The local police department aided in this matter by providing us with all the reports recently filed about the "creature" living in the forests. We deduced, correctly, that the creature and our suckhead were one and the same. This narrowed the search considerably to the area behind my house (a frightening prospect) all the way down to the Sewage Treatment Plant.

It was decided that we would start the search from my place and work our way downstream to the plant, using standard Search And Destroy procedure. As such, all agents were outfitted with three doses of the vaccine, pistols (with explosive tip bullets), flares, various blades ranging from swords to combat knives, and the ever present long-stick-of-poking. As much as other battalions mock the stick, it has proven its usefulness many times. We began our search soon after sunup, and spent the morning checking hollow logs, old sheds, and other dark areas that the suckhead may find inviting to hide in (we did, in fact, find an old Model T truck half buried in the ground that showed signs of recent habitation). Near the Sewage Plant we discovered a dead dog that appeared to have been fed on. This was the first direct sign of vampiric infection we had found. Since the animal had not been there more than 12 hours, we felt we were near our target.

I took point with Agent Lewis and Town covering me as we moved up a small creek bed. Our prey, it turns out, was hiding in one of the outboard pumping stations for the plant. The station is some distance from the complex proper, and appeared to have been seldom visited by maintenance (indeed, later investigation shows that this particular pump had been shut down some years prior). Since the door had at one point been painted shut, the broken paint-seal was the smoking gun. This, unfortunately, posed a problem. The pumping station had no windows to speak of, so it could be assumed to be very near nighttime darkness inside. We had no night-vision equipment along with us. Since we had our prey cornered, we discussed just waiting the suckhead out. We quickly abandoned this plan when Agent Town pointed out that the pumping station had lines large enough to crawl through connecting it with both the main plant and the river itself, providing convenient means of escape for a hunted vampire.

After some deliberation, we settled on a frontal attack, hoping to keep the vampire confused and unable to escape before we finished him off. Entry was achieved by the application of the large combat-booted foot of Agent Lewis. Though not the most subtle means of entry, it was designed to surprise our quarry. Once the door was broken open, we each tossed a flare into the station, filling it rather nicely with light. The loud inhuman screams of a blinded, enraged, vampire signaled our success.

Unfortunately, the vampire did something rather unexpected: as we rushed in, he rushed out. Agent Town was knocked backwards out the door, with the vampire landing on top of her and biting her on reflex. She was able to force him off by jabbing him in the neck with her dagger, sending him howling off towards the river. After verifying that she was fine (and applying her vaccine), Agent Lewis and I engaged in pursuit of the still screaming vampire. Once we caught up with him, no doubt helped by the fact that the stupid blind bastard kept running into trees, he was quickly beheaded and the remains burned. Agent Lewis gets credited with the kill, which while not particularly difficult, he seemed to take great pleasure in.

In closing, Agent Town is recovering nicely from the ordeal. Agent Lewis was treated by Agent Town and myself to a generous round of beer at the other local bar, which he consumed with great gusto. Unfortunately, this resulted in us having to practically carry the big ox back to his home to sleep it off.

We will continue to monitor the situation in Mid Michigan, but since vampiric and zombie activity has been low this year are hoping for a quiet winter. As long as we don't have a repeat of last year's outbreak I will be happy.

Agent Maniac
531st FVZA Battalion

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