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Incident Report

Agent/Witness: Evos E.

Base: Athens, Greece

Date/Time: 1/18/12, 11:30 p.m.

Incident: I was walking home when I heard a noise behind me. I turned and saw what I thought was a couple making out. The man appeared to be hugging the lady. Then I heard her scream, and I saw that the woman was trying to escape. Thinking the man was trying to rape her, I acted fast. I ran to them and shouted, "what's going on here?" I then shouted "it's the police" and held up my driver's license to make it look like I was showing a police badge.

This report highlights the dire conditions in Athens
that could lead to a vampire or zombie outbreak.

The man let the girl go and turned to me. I looked deep into his eyes and I stopped moving. He was acting like a dog, smelling the air and turning his head right and left like he was trying to understand what I was. The girl ran away while the guy was walking toward me.

I live in a bad neighborhood, so I've had to fight many times when someone wanted to steal my money or my mobile phone. I got ready for a fight, shouting warnings to the man, but he just stood there, looking at me with eyes that were almost red. I tried to scare him by making sudden moves towards him (I was about five meters away from him).

Just then, a car turned onto the street, flashing its lights over us and forcing me to turn my head the other way to protect my eyes. When I turned back the man was gone. I could see him walking away in a really weird way. I though he was just drunk.

Today on the morning news I heard that someone broke into a food store and stole some supplies. The store was recently forced to close because it was selling tainted meat that was making people sick. The first thing that came to my mind was the guy in the street. I locked my doors and stayed inside.

Have you seen "Zombieland?" The first zombie ate a MAD COW burger. Is it just the movie's plot, or can mad cow-infected meat really have these complications? Was the hobo was some kind of zombie? Is the girl infected? If so, that makes two. And surely they will infect more. If each of them infects one, then two make four, four make eight...

Is it the virus that will start a zombie apocalypse? Am I going insane? Am I overreacting??? I called the police and told them about the man, but they laughed and told me not to watch so many zombie movies.

I don't have any family, so I'm free to investigate by my own. I'll update when I have more. I hope I'm just overreacting.

Comment from Dr. Pecos: It's certainly possible that you witnessed a zombie attack. The movements of the man you described resemble those of an early-stage zombie. If it was a vampire it would not move in a drunken manner. Was there any blood on his mouth? On the woman? As for the scenario presented in Zombieland, I don't think this is likely.The zombie virus spreads through the entry of the virus into the bloodstream, usually through a bite. The virus cannot survive the acidic atmosphere of the stomach, so it is not transmitted through food.

On a related note, I'm very concerned by the situation in Greece. The economic crisis has made conditions ideal for a vampire and zombie outbreak, particularly in cities like Athens. You have a growing number of abandoned structures occupied by impoverished immigrants (see accompanying video). Crime, prostitution and drug dealing—all factors in vampire and zombie outbreaks—are on the rise. The situation bears close monitoring.

Stay alert and please keep me posted.

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